| Category: Extended Family Issues | |||||
| ?# | M | F | S | Question | |
| + | 6 | A | A | Our families' religious traditions are similar. | |
| + | 11 | A | A | Both of my parents grew up in the same religious tradition. | |
| + | 19 | A | A | My family would not approve if I converted to my partner's faith. | |
| + | 24 | A | A | My parents practiced different faiths and it was never a problem for my family. | |
| + | 25 | A | A | My partner and I come from families with very different values. | |
| + | 34 | A | A | I worry that either of our families will cause friction between us. | |
| + | 38 | A | A | My family is pleased by my choice of partner. | |
| + | 63 | A | A | My family believes that religious obligations are more important than other responsibilities. | |
| + | 64 | A | A | My parents were from different cultures or religions so I understand what intermarriage means. | |
| + | 69 | A | A | My parents do not understand the ways of the culture in which I live. | |
| + | 91 | A | A | My partner is angry with his/her family for causing problems between us. | |
| + | 92 | A | A | I am concerned that financial help from our families will cause us some problems. | |
| + | 100 | A | A | We may have problems because our families have quite different cultural values. | |
| + | 126 | A | A | My family is against our marriage. | |
| + | 133 | A | A | My partner and I have clear and comfortable boundaries between us and our families. | |
| + | 135 | A | A | I am worried that my family will cut themselves off from me if I marry outside of my religious tradition. | |
| In Agreement: Him: 0% - Her: 0% - Cpl: 100% - Both: 0% | |||||
| Category: Individual and Couple Issues | |||||
| ?# | M | F | S | Question | |
| + | 2 | A | A | I am afraid of not being able to satisfy my partner sexually. | |
| + | 3 | A | A | There are times when I doubt my partner has made the right choice of a mate. | |
| + | 4 | A | A | One of us always insists on being right. | |
| + | 5 | A | A | It is hard to express my true feelings to my partner. | |
| + | 7 | A | A | I am concerned about my partner's ability to handle money. | |
| + | 12 | A | A | When I am angry I say or do things that hurt my partner. | |
| + | 14 | A | A | My partner feels comfortable with most of my friends. | |
| + | 15 | A | A | I worry that my marriage is a betrayal of my family. | |
| + | 16 | A | A | Men should make most of the decisions in marriage. | |
| + | 17 | A | A | Sometimes I am bothered by my partner's prejudices. | |
| + | 21 | A | A | Drinking and/or drugs change my partner's personality. | |
| + | 22 | A | A | One or both of our jobs is causing some problems in our relationship. | |
| + | 23 | A | A | I am content with the ways we show affection for each other. | |
| + | 26 | A | A | My partner needs more hobbies or leisure activities. | |
| + | 31 | A | A | There are some leisure activities that I do not enjoy doing with my partner. | |
| + | 39 | A | A | I am sometimes upset by my partner's sense of humor. | |
| + | 42 | A | A | I am sometimes displeased with my partner's appearance. | |
| + | 47 | A | A | The issue of premarital sex has caused us some conflict. | |
| + | 51 | A | A | I accept the way my partner handles personal problems. | |
| + | 54 | A | A | My partner and I share the same view of the role of women in marriage. | |
| + | 55 | A | A | I am sometimes uncomfortable with my partner's behavior. | |
| + | 56 | A | A | I cannot imagine living very far away from my family. | |
| + | 57 | A | A | My partner has trouble talking about some of his/her feelings. | |
| + | 58 | A | A | To have a successful marriage intermarried couples must honestly deal with their differences. | |
| + | 59 | A | A | Sometimes I worry about my partner's temper. | |
| + | 61 | A | A | My partner often seems depressed. | |
| + | 67 | A | A | I feel/felt a lot of pressure about our wedding plans. | |
| + | 68 | A | A | My partner has habits that annoy me. | |
| + | 71 | A | A | I am satisfied with the ways we resolve the differences between us. | |
| + | 73 | A | A | Sometimes I do not know what to do about my partner's moodiness. | |
| + | 74 | A | A | My partner and I share the same view of the role of men in marriage. | |
| + | 77 | A | A | The roles of husband and wife that we have learned from our families are similar. | |
| + | 79 | A | A | Our different food and cooking preferences cause us problems. | |
| + | 81 | A | A | I can always count on my partner to be a good listener. | |
| + | 82 | A | A | Sometimes my partner really hurts my feelings. | |
| + | 85 | A | A | There are times when I do not like to be touched. | |
| + | 87 | A | A | My partner is too busy for us to do enough things together. | |
| + | 89 | A | A | There is/was a conflict between us about the type of wedding to have. | |
| + | 93 | A | A | We sometimes misunderstand each other because we grew up speaking different languages. | |
| + | 94 | A | A | My partner and I agree on how much time we spend with our families. | |
| + | 95 | A | A | I can count on my partner to give me support when I am feeling down. | |
| + | 97 | A | A | When we have had a disagreement one or both of us tries to avoid talking about it. | |
| + | 102 | A | A | I often feel caught between trying to please my partner and trying to please my family. | |
| + | 104 | A | A | I feel I would benefit from knowing more about my spouses' religious traditions. | |
| + | 107 | A | A | I am sometimes afraid of my partner. | |
| + | 109 | A | A | I believe that religious obligations are more important than other responsibilities. | |
| + | 110 | A | A | We share many of the same interests. | |
| + | 112 | A | A | It is usually easy to talk with each other because our communication styles are similar. | |
| + | 114 | A | A | Too often my partner refuses to compromise. | |
| + | 119 | A | A | I feel good about my body. | |
| + | 120 | A | A | I am worried that we do not have enough insurance. | |
| + | 121 | A | A | My partner sometimes embarrasses me when drinking or high. | |
| + | 125 | A | A | I expect that we will make decisions in our marriage like my parents did. | |
| + | 131 | A | A | My partner's needs must be more important to me than my family's needs. | |
| + | 132 | A | A | I am uncomfortable when I am around some members of my partner's family. | |
| + | 134 | A | A | I worry that the physical or mental health of either of us will cause us problems. | |
| + | 136 | A | A | I really need my partner to be accepted by my family. | |
| + | 140 | A | A | My parents use a lot of guilt and manipulation to try to get me to do what they want. | |
| + | 144 | A | A | I never felt like I fit in with my family's culture. | |
| In Agreement: Him: 0% - Her: 0% - Cpl: 100% - Both: 0% | |||||
| Category: Faith and Religion | |||||
| ?# | M | F | S | Question | |
| + | 10 | A | A | The fact that I am religious and my partner is not religious should not make a difference. | |
| + | 18 | A | A | I would lose some important parts of myself if I converted to my partner's faith. | |
| + | 20 | A | A | Converting to a different religion would make me a different person. | |
| + | 27 | A | A | Our religious differences have created a sense of distance between us. | |
| + | 30 | A | A | It is hard for me to understand the way my partner practices his/her faith. | |
| + | 32 | A | A | I believe religious faith provides the foundation for marriage. | |
| + | 33 | A | A | I understand why many people think that marriages between members of different religions are doomed to fail. | |
| + | 35 | A | A | I am only really comfortable practicing my faith with people from my own denomination. | |
| + | 36 | A | A | I do not feel accepted when I attend my partner's church/synagogue/mosque. | |
| + | 41 | A | A | I believe that my faith group does not understand our challenges. | |
| + | 43 | A | A | We do not have to deal with differences in our faiths until we have children. | |
| + | 44 | A | A | It concerns me that my partner's religious beliefs are stronger than mine. | |
| + | 48 | A | A | Our religious differences are the biggest problem we have in our relationship. | |
| + | 49 | A | A | Religious preference is a personal decision not a couple decision. | |
| + | 52 | A | A | We often argue about the differences between our religions. | |
| + | 60 | A | A | My partner is much more attached to his/her faith than I am attached to mine. | |
| + | 65 | A | A | It does not matter to me that my partner belongs to a different religious tradition because we all worship the same God. | |
| + | 70 | A | A | Our churches/synagogues/mosques have very different traditions and practices. | |
| + | 72 | A | A | We have figured out how to respect each other's religious traditions. | |
| + | 75 | A | A | I rely on my faith to help me deal with stresses in my life. | |
| + | 76 | A | A | We are members of religious denominations that have similar beliefs. | |
| + | 78 | A | A | As long as my partner respects my religious beliefs his/her feelings about religion do not matter to me. | |
| + | 84 | A | A | I believe that the rules related to intermarried couples in my partner's faith are unfair. | |
| + | 101 | A | A | My religious beliefs are personal so it does not matter which church/synagogue/mosque I attend. | |
| + | 103 | A | A | I worry that my relationship with God and my church/synagogue/mosque is not all that it should be. | |
| + | 105 | A | A | My religion and spiritual traditions are very important to me. | |
| + | 106 | A | A | I am afraid I would someday resent converting to my partner's denomination. | |
| + | 108 | A | A | Although we have different religious backgrounds our beliefs are not very different. | |
| + | 116 | A | A | Sharing the same religious denomination would allow us to stay connected with people like us. | |
| + | 117 | A | A | Religion is really not that important to me. | |
| + | 122 | A | A | Almost all of our friends are from church/synagogue/mosque. | |
| + | 123 | A | A | We would be closer to each other if we both practiced the same faith. | |
| + | 124 | A | A | I do not need to adopt my partner's beliefs because they are no better than my own. | |
| + | 127 | A | A | I believe the teachings of my faith are more “true” than other faiths. | |
| + | 130 | A | A | My partner and I have a strong connection to our religious backgrounds. | |
| + | 142 | A | A | I feel like I have very little influence on our decisions about religion. | |
| + | 143 | A | A | I am afraid that the person presiding at our marriage does not approve of my partner. | |
| In Agreement: Him: 0% - Her: 0% - Cpl: 100% - Both: 0% | |||||
| Category: Children | |||||
| ?# | M | F | S | Question | |
| + | 8 | A | A | We have agreed on the church/synagogue/mosque that our children will attend. | |
| + | 9 | A | A | Religious differences in families are not important until children are old enough to ask questions. | |
| + | 29 | A | A | I am afraid that problems from my childhood will affect the way I raise my children. | |
| + | 83 | A | A | I want my children to have the same religious experience I had growing up. | |
| + | 88 | A | A | If our children do not follow my religious tradition I will have to accept it and support them anyway. | |
| + | 99 | A | A | It is important for our children to understand and respect both of our faith traditions. | |
| + | 111 | A | A | Children raised in an intermarriage benefit from learning about different cultures and traditions. | |
| + | 118 | A | A | We have similar views about how children should be raised. | |
| + | 129 | A | A | I worry that having children will have a negative impact on our efforts to establish our own religious and cultural family traditions. | |
| + | 137 | A | A | We understand which of our cultural traditions we will share with our children. | |
| + | 141 | A | A | Trying to raise children in more than one faith would be too confusing for them. | |
| In Agreement: Him: 0% - Her: 0% - Cpl: 100% - Both: 0% | |||||
| Category: Ethnic and Cultural Diversity | |||||
| ?# | M | F | S | Question | |
| + | 1 | A | A | Even though our backgrounds are very different our educations have helped us overcome our differences. | |
| + | 13 | A | A | Although my partner does not understand a lot of things about my cultural background he/she tolerates the differences. | |
| + | 28 | A | A | It is essential that we respect each other's cultural traditions. | |
| + | 37 | A | A | Although I come from a strong cultural tradition I do not see myself as part of that tradition. | |
| + | 40 | A | A | My partner and I have strong connections to our ethnic backgrounds. | |
| + | 45 | A | A | I am the first generation of my family born in this country. | |
| + | 46 | A | A | I am uncomfortable trying to explain my cultural background to other people. | |
| + | 50 | A | A | It is important to honor both of our cultural traditions in our family. | |
| + | 53 | A | A | I am afraid of losing my identity if I adopt my partner's culture. | |
| + | 62 | A | A | Our differences have helped to teach me patience and greater tolerance for other cultures. | |
| + | 66 | A | A | Society is supportive of intermarried couples. | |
| + | 80 | A | A | There are some things about my culture that I do not want to share with my partner. | |
| + | 86 | A | A | We should choose to adopt either mine or my partner's cultural traditions for our family. | |
| + | 90 | A | A | I did not know many people from other religious or cultural groups when I was growing up. | |
| + | 96 | A | A | Our cultural diversity enriches our lives as a couple. | |
| + | 98 | A | A | I feel as though I need to educate myself more regarding my partner's ethnic background. | |
| + | 113 | A | A | Society in general does not accept intermarried couples. | |
| + | 115 | A | A | We would have fewer disagreements if we were from the same cultural background. | |
| + | 128 | A | A | Our relationship is enriched by combining elements from both of our cultural backgrounds. | |
| + | 138 | A | A | We often argue about our cultural differences. | |
| + | 139 | A | A | There is a lot I need to learn about my partner's culture. | |
| + | 145 | A | A | Our cultural differences are no more of a problem for us than our other differences. | |
| + | 146 | A | A | I have gained a lot from experiencing my partner's culture. | |
| + | 147 | A | A | Even though we are from very different backgrounds we really are not that different from each other. | |
| In Agreement: Him: 0% - Her: 0% - Cpl: 100% - Both: 0% | |||||
| Category: Marital Need | |||||
| ?# | M | F | S | Question | |
| + | 148 | A | A | Sometimes a woman/man should take a chance and marry even if they are not sure. | |
| + | 149 | A | A | Women/men today don't have to get married unless they really want to. | |
| + | 150 | A | A | People think that a woman/man who isn't married is a failure. | |
| + | 151 | A | A | A woman/man doesn't need to be married to have a good life. | |
| In Agreement: Him: 0% - Her: 0% - Cpl: 100% - Both: 0% | |||||
| Category: Marital Commitment | |||||
| ?# | M | F | S | Question | |
| + | 152 | A | A | Even if a woman/man thinks their marriage is bad they should keep trying to save it. | |
| + | 153 | A | A | If a married couple aren't getting along they should get a divorce. | |
| + | 154 | A | A | If a woman/man thinks they married the wrong person they should get a divorce. | |
| + | 155 | A | A | Even if a wife/husband doesn't love their spouse they should still stay married to them. | |
| In Agreement: Him: 0% - Her: 0% - Cpl: 100% - Both: 0% | |||||
| Category: Marital Desirability | |||||
| ?# | M | F | S | Question | |
| + | 156 | A | A | It's much better to be married than single. | |
| + | 157 | A | A | I have wanted to be married for as long as I can remember. | |
| + | 158 | A | A | A single woman/man needs to find a man/woman to get married to. | |
| + | 159 | A | A | A woman/man should be married to one man/woman for as long as they both live. | |
| + | 160 | A | A | A woman/man needs to be married to be really happy. | |
| + | 161 | A | A | To be married is one of the most important things in a woman's/man's life. | |
| + | 162 | A | A | A woman/man feels more grown up after she/he gets married. | |
| + | 163 | A | A | Most women/men would rather be married than single. | |
| + | 164 | A | A | A married woman/man gets more respect. | |
| In Agreement: Him: 0% - Her: 0% - Cpl: 100% - Both: 0% | |||||
| Category: Marital Undesirability | |||||
| ?# | M | F | S | Question | |
| + | 165 | A | A | The way things are today women/men shouldn't expect their marriages to last for life. | |
| + | 166 | A | A | Many women/men I know are sorry they got married. | |
| + | 167 | A | A | Women/men usually give more than they get from marriage. | |
| + | 168 | A | A | When a woman/man gets married they give up most of their freedom. | |
| + | 169 | A | A | Women/men often get a bad deal from marriage. | |
| + | 170 | A | A | A woman's/man's family usually pushes them to get married. | |
| + | 171 | A | A | Just because people are in love doesn't mean they should get married. | |
| In Agreement: Him: 0% - Her: 0% - Cpl: 100% - Both: 0% | |||||
?# = Question Number
M = Male
F = Female
S = Supplied
N = Not Applicable
X = Skipped
e = Unknown Error
+ = Questions in disagreement
Him - Male % of agreement to the Author
Her - Female % of agreement to the Author
Cpl - Male % of agreement to the Female
Both - Both % of agreement to the Author